In recent years watching pornography has become somewhat normalized. As a matter of fact, over 40 million people in the United States alone visit porn websites regularly, and over a third of them are women.

But just because it is normalized, does not mean that it is harmless, or that it doesn’t have a big impact on your life.

It has become more and more clear that porn does affect relationships, and not in a good way.

Foundation of Trust

At a fundamental level, all healthy relationships are built on trust. It is an essential prerequisite that couples need to be able to make themselves vulnerable, open, and become intimate.
When one partner watches porn, it makes the other feel that they are being intimate with a third party. It breaks the trust they may have and erodes its foundations. Once that trust is broken, it is not easy to mend.

Emotional Intimacy

Porn can often suggest that sexual intimacy binds couples together. In fact, this is not true. It is emotional intimacy that is more meaningful, and strong relationships depend on couples being able to build emotional intimacy and make one another feel cherished, valued, and loved.
Although it isn’t only porn that pushes the myth that sexual intimacy is most important, it does have a big part to play. Ultimately that downplays the importance of emotional intimacy, which can lead to far less fulfilling and meaningful relationships.

Unrealistic Expectations

Watching porn inevitably ends up distorting a person’s expectations of what a normal body looks like, and what sexual behavior is all about. Porn is a fantasized and idealized portrayal of sex that is about self-gratification rather than intimacy. It also frequently involves dominating or mistreating the other person.
When one partner has such unrealistic expectations, it will have a negative impact on the relationship. Healthy sexual relationships should be a mutually satisfying expression of each other’s love, and not one-sided self-gratification.

Commitment Levels

Overall watching porn can end up reducing the commitment one has to a relationship. Many people end up desiring the fantasy alternative that porn represents to the extent that they actively pursue it – which results in real-world cheating.
It has been shown that porn-free relationships have a stronger commitment level. Partners that engage in them have a lower rate of infidelity, and the relationships last longer on average too.

Protecting Your Relationship from Harmful Effects of Porn

If you want a stronger and more fulfilling relationship, it is safe to say that you definitely steer clear of porn.
Unfortunately, that may be easier said than done. Many people become addicted to porn and find it difficult to kick the habit.
Porn addiction is a very real condition that is not easy to handle. At Novus Mindful we are here to help you overcome your porn addiction and get back on track to full recovery.

All said and done, your relationship will be happier and healthier once you take porn out of the equation – both for you as well as your partner.