If your marriage or relationship has been impacted by infidelity and broken trust, the results can be devastating for everyone involved. The experience and trauma of infidelity – especially sexual infidelity – can be one of the most painful experiences that someone can endure.
In fact, according to many trauma experts, the experience of enduring infidelity can result in someone having effects that “resemble the psychic disorientation and confusion of individuals who endure PTSD-inducing trauma.”
While every instance of infidelity can be unique, our team of counselors and therapists at Novus Mindful Life has discovered several experiences that are shared across those who have been victimized. Here are several ways that infidelity can impact every aspect of your life:
Your relational expectations will be violated.
When you enter a relationship with an individual, you often come with a myriad of expectations and desires. Trust, faithfulness, and fidelity are at the top of the list, and when those are broken and damaged, the expectations that you had of how your relationship will work will be altered forever. This damage can be long-lasting and make it difficult for you to trust again in the future.
It will be difficult to engage with the painful emotions that arise.
The life change that happens immediately when your trust is violated will bring a wave of emotion that can be incredibly difficult to manage and experience. The pain and suffering can be more than some can endure, especially when the infidelity is first revealed. This can lead to sudden and uncontrollable anger, fear, guilt, anxiety, and more.
You won’t know if the pain will ever end.
It can be heartbreaking to speak with victims of infidelity and hear them share the fear that their pain and suffering will never end. Many struggle with two anxieties – that their current pain will never get better, and that they will never be able to trust anyone in the future. Fortunately, with the help of a trained and experienced therapist, victims can learn to turn that pain and struggle into courage and boldness.
You will lose emotional security and years of your life.
When infidelity breaks apart a relationship, the victims will soon find that their emotional security has been robbed – leaving them wondering who they can trust. It can be increasingly difficult to trust friends and family, even those who have never given a reason to not trust their intentions.
Similarly, years of your life may be stolen as well. Depending on the length of the relationship, infidelity can tear away years of memories and joy that seem to have been built on a lie. The impact of losing this period of your life can be incredibly damaging and have long-lasting consequences.
You will experience extremes of guilt, grief, and low self-esteem.
Beyond simply damaging the relationship, infidelity can also break apart one’s self-esteem and sense of self-worth. This can lead a victim to ride a rollercoaster of emotions ranging from feelings of guilt that they didn’t love their significant other enough to deep grief over the loss of something so precious and sacred.
When infidelity includes sexual intimacy with another person, the sense that you aren’t “good enough” or “look right” to the other can cause your self-esteem to plummet to lows that can cause anxiety, depression, and unhealthy actions.
Begin The Path To Healing
The experiences that come with infidelity can be so traumatic that many victims find themselves in isolated, dangerous circumstances mentally and physically. Some will be tempted to act out in anger toward those who have betrayed them or will seek to hurt themselves for allowing the situation to occur.
There is hope for those who have found themselves a victim of the trauma of infidelity. At Novus Mindful Life, our team of skilled, personal, and experienced trauma counselors will help you work through your experience and move toward healing from infidelity.
With a personal touch that moves at your speed, our therapists are ready to journey with you through trauma recovery. Contact our team today to learn more about our services, and to discover more content to help you understand sexual infidelity and addiction.